Monday, August 27, 2018

Vacation surprise

So I am on vacation this week. It's the old "use them or lose them" type of vacation. No real plans. Maybe get to a ball game. Or a day trip or two. But I had a great surprise today when my second cousin, three times removed showed up on my doorstep today.

Anytime Kenny shows up, I give him a post on this blog. So have at it Kenny.


This blog has been far too boring, so let's spice it up with my Top Ten Most Painful DP Eliminations of the Day:

Starting at number 10 is Jeff Kent. But after his run-in at second base, he'll need to change his name to Jeff Kent Walk Anymore.

Number 9 is Ray Boone. You can already see the pained look on his face and he just came to realize the error of his ways before gravity takes over. It's been good knowing you, Ray.

Number 8 is Erick Aybar, doing the splits to avoid the hits, but soon his bits will be turned into grits.

At number 7 is Brent Gates, admiring his throw over to one while the runner turns him into number two.

At six is Rey Ordonez, flopping and high kicking his way into a trade to the New York Traction-politans.

Number 5 is Tony Womack who is divided into three separate players and making 6 outs on one play.

At number 4 is Billy Ripken, attempting to make the throw off balance, but only causing his spleen to explode. What a Fuck Face.

Number 3 is Frank Duffy, looking down at the death he has caused, only to see the light at the end of the tunnel racing towards him as he returns back to Earth.

Number 2 is Chris Getz, moments before his nards are torn from his body, ending the family line of Getz players in the MLB. Our condolences to The Getz Family. And Chris' nards.

And my most painful DP elimination of the day goes TO..........

David Eckstein, who is so eliminated he has transcended all time and space is now resides within a black hole, trapped for all eternity suspended in a netherworld between life and death, being and not being.

 Enjoy the rest of your week, and you know what we always say.


  1. "I want to shriv my nards."
    "'Nards', that's what we needed to hear."

    The Getz is a personal favorite for obvious reasons but I like the long-forgotten triple-Womack shift, a great strategy in the pre-"baseball nerds" days.

  2. Excellent song. Overkill is terrific.

  3. Great ordonez pic on that score card

  4. Lots of great action shots here. Gotta track down a copy of that Erick Aybar. Not sure how this card has eluded me all of these years.

  5. He shoots lasers out of his third nard...right you are Ken!

  6. Six outs in one play? How is that not #1?
    Hope you're having a nice vacation!